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Depressed and not supported....
Started
by Devon
on December 21, 2009
I was so excited after reading TKD to be a vegan and now whenever i slip up i get so mad at myself and feel like i can't do it, and that i won't lose the weight i want. Losing weight takes forever and I am so impatient! It doesn't help either having a family that looks at you like your crazy whenever you deny unhealthful foods, so in order to not make them think i'm weird i just give in. I also feel like my appetite is out of control, since cutting out dairy i think i'm going overboard on the whole grains.Does anyone else feel this way? What should I do?
Becoming vegan is a major life change and the implications of that change are profound. I have a meat and potatoes family that think I am nuts for not being vegan. I took a lot of ribbing at first but over time, they became more interstested in what I eat and how I manage things. They now check labels and ask me if I can eat things. I think it took them seeing that I was serious about it to stop bugging me. Don't compromise what you believe in and know is right just because people will give you a hard time. I think it passes in time and patience is a virtue. As far as weight, vegan is so much more than that. It's an amazing feeling to eat clean and it creates an emotional completeness as well. It takes time and practice. Try not to beat yourself up when you slip, nobody is perfect. You just pick yourself up, dust yourself off and start all over again. Remember what diet means; a day's journey. Just one day at time. Posting here is a great outlet also. We've all been there. Hang in there...it will get better. :)
Don't worry about what others think and remember it's about a healthier you. Your appetite is probably out of control because your stressing. Play around with some dishes so you don't get bored with the whole grains and there are a lot of non-dairy items you can try that are a great substitute like almond milk, tofutti "ice cream". Last but not least if your trying to lose weight don't beat yourself up about slipping with some items because then you mad, stressed and that alone will make you gain weight. It's ok to slip up and remember it's not a diet, but just a healthier lifestyle. You didn't gain the weight overnight so it won't go away overnight. It took me a little over a year to lose 50-60lbs and it's just by healthy lifestyle changes, not beating myself-up and exercise. You can do it and I wish you all the best!!!!
Ditto to what has already been said, remember this is a choice that you've made for yourself to be healthier, so don't let what others think of your choice make you feel pressured. If they truly care about you they will eventually "back off" once they see that you are serious and committed. I've personally learned that for myself weight loss alone is a fickle motivator - I lost 13lbs in the first five weeks and then two weeks of nothing. I can't let this discourage me because no matter what, I feel so much better and I don't ever want to go back to eating the way I did.
Thanks to all of you for the support!! I totally agree with everything that has been said and i realize now that i need to make this change for myself and the people who love me should respect my decision. :)
Life is a journey, not a destination. We have to take it one day at a time. and remember to put ourselves first! By giving in to family and eating things we feel is not compatiable with where we are in our journey does not move us further and in the long run doesn't really make their lives different either.
I think when we make changes to better ourselves, whether it's diet, exercise, mediation, yoga, a new career.....it holds a mirror up to others for them to look at their lives and it makes them uncomfortable.
Eating a steak to make someone else happy doesn't work...not for us and certainly not for them. You can't meet others demands b/c they have so many variables that are out of control. The only person we are in control of is ourselves. So work with yourself, patiently, loviingly and softely and don't worry about what others think. Trying to please others would be a frustrating rat race b/c they are changing constantly too and we can't keep up with all those variables.
I had to sit. Read the book bit by bit and commit to what I could commit to. I've been a vegan...I'm working on the sugar part. Cutting sugar at Christmas with fruit cakes and cookies and boxes from william sonoma arriving in the mail. But I'm learning to just eat the really good things and in moderation.
Life is process, a learning experience. It's fun and interesting and we learn through yoga and meditation to take it one step at a time.
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