The KInd Life Community Forum

my brother in laws wedding was on 9/11 (i know right). friday night was the rehearsal dinner at a very fancy upscale italian restaurant. my mother in law called in advance and spoke to the dinner cordinater there to let her know i was vegan and they were supposed to have an eggplant pasta dish ready for me. of course when i get there and the loud mad waiter asked what i would like to order i told him i was the special plate. he freaked out and was like "you dont eat cheese or any of the good stuff?" you couldve heard a pin drop! then my mother in law who was seating like 4 seats away yells "i took care of this weeks ago." i was beyond embarrassed and just kept telling him dont worry about it im not hungry and he proceeds to tell me he will be on a quest to find me something to eat. so the 18 top table all started talking about my veganism and i had no food. such a discouraging evening

That sounds horrible! I'm so sorry you went through this but it wasn't your fault! Like your mother said, she took care of this and so it shouldn't have been an issue. Shame on that restaurant.

Oh, that really sucks. That horrible feeling of not wanting to cause a scene and it is everyone else doing it on your behalf. Bum night! In these situations I have taken great delight in the fact that most brandy and vodka is vegan! Yay!

all of there pasta had eggs in it and their red sauce had cheese cooked in it! im italian and i never use egg noodles and my pawpaw doesnt put cheese in his red gravy! and i just found out yesterday that they charged my mother in law $48 for me anyways! and caroline i had 4 martinis lol i was trying to fill up on the olives

Sometimes we get tested to find our real voice in "why we've gone vegan." We get a chance to open up and speak intelligently to our friends, relatives and even strangers at restaurants. I usually see it as more of a opportunity than a challenge. Even the most harried-looking waiters can be engaged in conversation. Let them say what they will behind your back but if you stay true to your principles, that frequently speaks louder than words.

My boyfriend and I (both vegan) were out for a day trip with his parents and his father had his heart set on a seafood restaurant for dinner-- this was your average fried seafood joint with no obligations to offer anything else. When we asked the hostess what veggie options existed, she said corn on the cob and baked potatoes. She offered that there was a little cafe across the street with more options. My boyfriend said to his parents, why don't you get your meal to-go and we'll get something across the street and we can eat together at a community table. That's what we did and it seemed to be OK by all involved! Doesn't sound like a solution that would have necessarily worked for the rehearsal dinners but sometimes creative solutions can be found. :)

Betsy-- hope your mother-in-law disputed the $48 charge! Maybe you could post a "review" for that restaurant online-- even happycow.com would probably like to hear about it's lack of vegan support.