I was following the Kind Diet pretty flawlessly for 5 months, till I found out my bf was cheating on me. I went into a massive depression, stopped eating all together and then when I started eating again it was complete junk, I didn't care I just ate anything.
And now I can't get back on the wagon. I've tried several times and I just can't stick with it and I'm wondering how I even did it those 5 months.
I've gotten fat, I've lost all motivation to work out. I eat sweets to make myself feel better emotionally.
Please does anyone have any magical words of wisdom to share?
Hi Angel. So sorry to hear you've been through so much. The best advice I can give you is to let go of the 'all or nothing' perspective as much as you can. Every kind meal you eat will contribute to your wellbeing, and every setback is only that, a setback. It is not permanent and is less powerful than any positive step. I would try using transitional foods, start with vegan sweets and build from there. Give yourself permission to take it slowly.
Hi Angel. It can be pretty tough to eat properly when you have so much going on emotionally. I know it is for me. The good news is that you've done it once before so you definitely can do it again! Eden is right, baby steps. You put one foot in front of the other so to speak. Before you know it you'll pick up where you left off and never look back. I know you can do it, I'm rooting for you!
I'm so sorry to hear that you've been going through such a tough time. I think you should take up kick boxing! Or normal boxing, box aerobics or some kind of aggressive work out that allows you to channel your sadness into a healthily directed anger. I know that sounds a little strange, but having gone through a very similar thing a few years back I can tell you that anger is a much more productive motivator than sadness! And although obviously you don't want to be wandering around in a rage (not fun for the people you meet!), if you could spend a couple of hours a week punching a bag and pretending you're punching all the bad feelings your bf gave you, then it would hopefully give you a lot of clarity while you get yourself back on track both in terms of diet and emotions. And going to a class is a good motivator too!
P.S. This is a little bit lame but when I was down about my old bf cheating on me I made myself a gold star chart like little kids have. I would write myself a little list of what I wanted to achieve that day (go for run, try not to cry in front of people etc. etc.) and give myself a gold star if I achieved it (silver if I only missed one thing) and when I had a certain number of stars (2 silver = 1 gold) then I bought myself a treat! Very childish but it made me feel better and gave me achievable goals xx
I can relate to eating and getting way off track due to emotions. I deal, sometimes daily, with emotions directly connected to my own relationship and I find myself turning to food to kind of numb the feelings.
When we turn to food for comfort, especially unhealthy foods, we should remember that punishing ourselves(health and emotion) isn't going to help. I know that can be hard, I go through similar things where I know that when I eat unhealthily it's only damaging myself, but somehow that seems to be worth it. I'm not happy with this pattern I see in myself and I hope you don't feel the same.
As the saying goes, "pick yourself up by the boot straps." You want to heal and you want the pain to stop. So start by healing yourself, heal what you eat. You don't want to beat yourself up by feeding your body junk food. But at the same time, when you mess up, when you slip up with your diet don't hate yourself for it. Just keep trying. I don't feel like I've done a very good job trying to say what I feel, but, love yourself and start by showing your body love and that you care by making those small victories with eating.
If you have junk food around the house you could put notes on them with little sayings like "do I really want this, or a nice bath." or "I could eat this or I could go channel these emotions into a punching bag." And I do like Herbie Veg's idea of the gold star chart. It's motivation and it's fun. I hope some of this helps.
I always do better with a little motivation. Tell yourself that he has way to much control over you and it's time to show him he can't affect you any longer. The best revenge is to put on the big girl panties and show him that you are way better than that. Easier said than done, but it may be motivational.
Herbie veg-I do martial arts and there is nothing better than getting hit and hitting back! Love, love, love it.